Recently I was debating with a young female friend of mine about how all woman are conniving cat like creatures who can't be trusted since the day Delilah screwed Samson. All woman are Delilahs! "Whose Delilah?" she blankly responded. I then had to explain the story in her lingo.. I think .. which was reasonably humorous. It went something like this...
Once upon a time long ago there was this dude named Samson. Samson was this buff kick arse special forces army warrior dude who got super kung foo kick arse powers from God. He was tougher than Chuck Norris and once killed 1000 enemy soldiers with just his bare ass. The secret to his strength was his hair. God told his mum to never cut it and he would have unlimited power up turbo button.
So that is what gave him his hulk like powers so he could defeat all their enemies. One day the badies – who were sick of getting smashed up all the time thought "Crap man... we’re sick of getting smashed up all the time man wodda we gonna do?” "I know" said Philistinnix "Woman!! surely Sampson can't resisit fine ass clunge.. thats gotta be his weakness?"
So they paid the town's hottest slutbag woman “Delilah" to go in undercover and sleaze the secret of his strength out of Samson. She was hot and had big titties so Samson could’nt resist. Being the skank-ho whore she was, Deliah used all her womanly powers to her advantage and kept asking Samson after they’d shagged “Oh youso strwong Samson.. wot makes you so strwong?”. But Sampson wouldn't tell her. She kept nagging and nagging him till one day poor Samson gave in and after a particularly spectacular screw he told her it was his hair. As long as it stays long he would remain strong!
So the next night Delilah got Samson all horney and had him over for a special sexy-dinner and she put some rohypnol in his food so he fell asleep straight away after a big shagging session. She then cut all his hair off and pished off out the door back to the baddies HQ . When Sampson woke up... Delilah was gone.. as was his plasma, Corvette Chariot keys, best going out thongs...and so was his hair!!! So then Sampson was weak as pish so the baddies came and kicked all their arses!!
3 comments:
hahaha.. wikipedia says differently
Its basically the same, cept my version is better. I tried to writeth it in language and a version thou mighteth understand
The "KING Jane EMO " version
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